Poetry and Prose

Her subtle whispers...

2012-01-23T07:49:00.000-08:00

I know that she cannot speak
She is so very beautiful
It almost seems unnatural
And a bit selfish of me
Refusing to set her free
Just because I am chained
It's not a choice of her making
Unlike my own years of regret

Set me free

Her subtle whispers from a jar
Sealed tightly with it's golden lid
All for my pleasure and daydreams
The Monarch is trapped inside
Longing to fly away from me
Envious that I cannot go with her
I need her near me and within my reach

Set me free

Compilation Haiku

2012-01-13T18:23:00.000-08:00

On a chilly winter's night
He spoons me skin on skin
And the ice sickles begin to melt

On the nightstand was his
Wedding band and to this day
He has yet to return

Bright moon smiles in the
Midst of a million little stars
Similar to my fragmented heart

Afraid to open my eyes
I take refuge in the sweet
Memories of my younger self

My journey toward love

2011-12-27T07:25:00.000-08:00

Since my youth
I have loved deeply
I have given love
I have shared love
I have bought love
I have compromised love
I have surrendered to love
I have searched for love
I have danced to love
I have withheld love
I have cried over love
I have drowned in love
I have been lost in love
I have sung to love
I have mimicked love
I have laughed with love
I have even faked love
I have forgiven love
I have learned to receive love
And finally, I have been
S-A-V-E-D by love

His Presence is Near

2011-11-27T04:27:00.000-08:00

The quiet morning whispers
wake up my child and go
see what I've prepared for you

I slowly turn towards the
edge of the bed and make
my way to the window

Half asleep and slightly
off balance, I begin to
gain my composure

And just as if I'd never
seen one before, another
amazing sun gift of love

In my cozy little bed
He simultaneously wraps
me in His love while

Painting the sky in an
array of amazing images
that only one could appreciate

If they in fact know who He
is and has a relationship with
Him unlike on one else on earth

In my humble flesh, I cry and
express my deepest gratitude
with one praise after another

He gently smiles at me
acknowledging that He is
pleased that someone

Not only knows Him, but
loves Him enough to be
in the midst of His greatness

And knowing without a doubt
that MAN could not have
done such a magnificent thing

That His greatest pleasure
is for His children to feel His
presence and know that He is near

Photograph taken on November 26, 2011

Illumination

2011-10-28T16:11:00.000-07:00

My poems are my most profound
moments frozen in time.

October Haiku ~

2011-10-06T15:04:00.000-07:00

Autumn nights bring an
Array of radiant gold flames
And I drift off to sleep

Anonymous Haiku ~

2011-10-04T03:12:00.000-07:00

Early Autumn morning
the mirror I stare into
shows my father's face

Lucid Dreamer

2011-09-22T19:16:00.000-07:00

In my sacred place
There is no sound
There is no color
And no creativity
Just a longing to be with you

In reality there
Is a coral blue sea
And a symphony of waves
Collapsing against the shore
Passionately calling out my name
And then my longing begins to fade

Good bye my friend

2011-09-16T20:49:00.000-07:00

In the middle of the night, she left. I was completely puzzled by the fact that there were no apparent signs, no disagreements or indications that she would soon end our relationship. I had always thought we shared something special, something unique. No one warmed my heart like her and no one made me smile as joyful and as wide as she did. I could be myself in her presence - completely silly, a little over weight and oftentimes lazy. We would spend countless days outside doing absolutely nothing. It was the closest I'd ever let anyone get to me with certainty that she wanted nothing in return. So, to think that she left without a single word - no note, no hug and no formal good bye is a bit hard to swallow. She literally packed her bags and vanished. With any hope at all, I'll see her again.

Good bye Summer. I'll surely miss you!

Inspired by Mary Oliver

2011-09-08T03:48:00.001-07:00

My bliss ~

Poetry makes me happy and therefore,
I'd like to remain there as long as
humanly possible.

How cool is this?

2011-09-04T06:24:00.000-07:00

This is not a poem but a serendipty moment...
I'm sitting on the beach reading MY poetry book!

Remember way back when?

2011-08-27T15:32:00.000-07:00

Remember when you were little
all things appeared new and amazing

Remember when you were little
dreams were exciting and possible

Remember when you were little
the imagination seemed endless

Remember when you were little
nothing mattered but the moment

and then came adulthood -
hurt, disappointments, bills

kids, marriage, maybe divorce and
oftentimes the monotony of life...

Well guess what
You hold the power to go
back there again

Go back and get your dreams
and dare to make one come true

I finally did - I became a published author!

Please go to one of the below
links to purchase a copy. It holds
some poetry from this blog but
lots of new stuff too!

www.xlibris.com/DeniseMFuller.html

www.xlibris.com/PoetryandProse.html

I pray that you enjoy it and begin
to to dream again!

All by God's Grace and all by
surrendering to His calling!

With lots of love and prayers,
Free Spirit Butterfly

My friend the poem ~

2011-08-24T11:23:00.000-07:00

Poetry helped find the lost me
to uncover and allow me to see
who God created me to be
my friend the poem for all eternity ~

North Beach Poetry & Prose Reading...

2011-08-17T06:10:00.000-07:00

Just sitting on the edge of the pier with one of my favorite poetry books. Reading, listening and journaling my thoughts. All by God's Grace and nothing I've done on my own. This is in deed my bliss!

Epiphany

2011-07-24T04:37:00.000-07:00

In His presence
In His stillness
In this moment
With His grace
I am one with my own heartbeat...

simply amazing ~

(This was July 19, 2011, while
sitting on the boardwalk in the
midst of a HOT summer's day
completely unaware of anything
else that surrounded me.)

He speaks to me...

2011-07-06T07:50:00.000-07:00

In the early morning
before the birds awake
before the sun can rise
before the coffee brews
before I am fully alert
He speaks to me...

"Yes Lord, I'm listening."

Stress Haiku

2011-06-13T03:28:00.001-07:00

In the midst of my chaos
He calms me with a
chocolate kiss ~

Morning Prayer

2011-05-05T04:19:00.000-07:00

Good morning God
it is me

The little girl you
saved and set free

You made a promise
to hear my plea

To shine your light
for the world to see

To walk like you
is who I long to be

So throughout the
day I'm trusting thee

In Jesus name,
amen

Morning Haiku

2011-04-18T03:28:00.000-07:00

~ The bird song
sweet, pure and magical

tiny heartbeats rejoice

What am I?

2011-04-01T05:49:00.000-07:00

I am misunderstood
intriguing
sensual
colorful
forgiving
passionate
subtle
creative
ancient
sadness
alive
cynical
daring
authentic
comforting
honest
humble
love and
eternal.
What am I?
I am a poem
Happy National Poetry Month
~w/love ~Free spirit butterfly

Holding on...

2011-03-02T05:15:00.000-08:00

Brown crunchy leaves hanging high,
swaying from side to side in the wind
refusing to fall to the ground -

Hundreds, if not thousands have surrendered
but similar to humans, a few hold on tight afraid of change.

3/2/11

Kelly's Haiku

2011-02-11T14:55:00.000-08:00

childlike faith
hidden within
slowly emerging

Psalm 46:10

2011-01-30T08:07:00.000-08:00

Being still

Yesterday as I quickly hopped into my car, I briefly looked up through my sunroof. It was rather dark for a Saturday afternoon and the clouds appeared to be moving rather briskly. I was getting ready to leave the nursing home with my prayer request in hand. I was on my way to my next destination and I had intentions on praying later that night. All of a sudden, a burst of sunlight appeared through the clouds and God gently reminded me to be still. I teared up and said a prayer, apologizing to God not knowing if there would be a "tonight." I stared up at Him and for a few moments I was amazed at how the clouds resembled the ocean waves. The bluish-gray clouds were waves, only upside down. You could have only noticed something like that if you were to remain still.

Signed,
His humble servant

2011

2011-01-04T03:20:00.000-08:00

With God's grace and mercy a new year unfolds. Resolve to resolve the resolutions and just live. Be in the moment. Aware of the earth and everything it holds. The moment when the clouds appear as pink as a rose and as soft as cotton. When the sun make its daily appearance as quiet and as gentle as a newborn sleeps. The moment when a bird sits perched on a nearby ledge unaware of your presence. When the raindrops are falling, replenishing our crops. When Spring flowers first bloom with no help from the human hand. When the Monarch flutters by in the midst of rush hour. When God whispers your name so sweet and lovingly. His promises revealed one after the other.

Be in the moment of a life so overflowing with blessings we often take them for granted. Be aware of the hungry, the sick, the hurting and the poverished. The death and destruction won't last for too long. Be in the moment when Jesus returns and takes hold of your hand. Eyes wide, heart pounding and tears flowing. Your journey on earth will all be worth it, if you live in the moment of worshiping our Lord.

sent w/love
free spirit butterfly

Fly away -

2010-12-05T16:55:00.000-08:00

I am on hiatus

until the Monarch

reappears -

or not...

My longing

2010-11-13T12:05:00.000-08:00

As the winged creature
flies above the earth,
I remain down below
envious of his freedom

Chasing a rainbow

2010-10-18T11:16:00.000-07:00

It was an intuition
the storm was over

the trees were calm
I could feel its presence
I ran to the window
and there it was
beautiful and bright

I ran downstairs
where's my camera?
Max leading the way
just as excited
flashbulb ready
as I ran to the curb
looked up to the sky
and it was gone
just as quickly
as it had appeared
I hold onto the
memory of that day

a reminder of God's

promise and one

of my last moments

with Max while

chasing a rainbow

Fall Hakiu

2010-09-14T02:44:00.000-07:00

Crunchy leaves falling
in an array of colors -
Please summer don't go

Gently blowing and
twirling in the wind like the
daydreams of my youth

my little black dress

2010-08-24T04:51:00.000-07:00

when i'm reading poetry
when i'm writing poetry
when i'm listening to poetry
when i'm drowning in poetry
when i'm day dreaming about poetry

it truly empowers me
transforms me
soothes me
uplifts me

i feel inspired
confident
sexy
alive
free

it's my little black dress

A tearful good bye

2010-08-13T10:03:00.000-07:00

Dedicated to my four legged companion of ten years.
Beloved Max * July 18, 2000 - August 12, 2010

I often wondered who would care for Max if anything were to happen to me. It never dawned on me that if something were to happen to him, who would care for me?

Now, that is no longer my concern, because the Lord is caring for us both.

August 12, 2010, at 1636 hours.

I never imagined
that he would die

Head upward so high,
float right to the sky

Before me,
ahead of me,
without me

Save me a space -
When I leave this place

I'll see you again
my best friend!

Signed, Max' mommy.

What's happening right now?

2010-08-08T05:43:00.000-07:00

It's Sunday
The Sun is shining bright as ever
Birds are singing ever so sweetly
"I'm going to be ready" playing in the background
Max is breathing heavily
I'm having a cup of java
It's currently 0854 hours
My lawn is cut. Not green; but cut
The air is moist
The lake is calm
My birthday balloon is still floating
The sky is blue, just as it was yesterday
My heart beat is slightly slower than normal
Song just changed. "Amazing GOD" is now playing
Max just moved a little closer to me
I think I'm experiencing symptoms of carpal tunnel
and above all, I am humble & awaiting HIS instructions.

Let the journey begin...

2010-07-14T15:23:00.000-07:00

I'm going to try and not post here for a while and begin putting the final touches on my Poetry Book. In the midst of my busyness, my coworker, Sharde' Harris, walked into my office last Tuesday with her very own self published book titled, "Songs of Poetry" in hand. That was all I needed to see. I know that the Lord sent her in there in order for her to share her story with me and for me to release my talent out into the Universe. After all, our talents and gifts are given to us at birth in order that we may "Glorify Him."

At first, it was all about "my book" and my passion and my greeting cards and my work and my finances and my .... -

When I finally surrendered it ALL to HIM and started to develop a more meaningful and intimate relationship with the Lord, he gently whispered, "It's time."

WOW - I truly surrendered my dream to Him and put it on a shelf until He gave me the green light. I can't tell you how rewarding that is and I haven't even went to press yet!

Jeremiah 29:11-14

love, peace and blessings
free spirit butterfly

When the Lord moves me...

2010-07-05T08:17:00.000-07:00

The seasons will still change according to his will
The birds will still sing sweetly in the trees
The sun will still rise at dawn, so bold and brightly
The butterflies will still flutter so free and full of wonder
The trees will still sway gently from side to side and repeat
The flowers will still bloom so beautifully, year after year
The clouds will still display their infamous silver lining
The wind will still blow invisibly throughout the universe
The rain drops will still fall diagonally against my window sill
The leaves will still change from green to yellow, orange and red
The first snow fall will still appear as pure as the day of birth
The lakes will still reflect the beauty of anything that comforts it
The rainbow will still be a reminder of God's promise to his children
The moon will still hang high in the sky, guiding me towards home
And if my heart still beats, I will continue to praise him.

My passion for Christ

2010-06-24T18:14:00.000-07:00

In my journey to discover my life's purpose, I had spent countless years traveling down many dark and narrow paths only to find a pattern of aloneness, fear and insecurity. But then after discovering the courage to hold on just a little while longer, at the end, what I had discovered was the most beautiful incredible light I'd ever seen!

Not Shakespeare...

2010-06-04T11:40:00.000-07:00

To be or not to be...

When I was a little girl, no one
ever asked me what I wanted to be.

I never wanted to be a teen mom
I never wanted to be someone's girl
I never fantasized about being a bride
I always envisioned I'd become a journalist
I often wished I had joined the Marines
It was never my desire to be in control
I never wanted to suppress my true feelings
I've always wanted to be a good friend
I never knew that I would become a leader
It was never my goal to over achieve
I never wanted to be driven by fear
I never imagined that I'd write short stories
I only day dreamed about being a cop
I'd always long to be loved unconditionally

Who or what do I want to be?

I never knew what I wanted to be.
Deep down inside HE was calling out to me,
to be what HE created me to be, a follower of
his son, Jesus Christ!

a vision

2010-05-15T04:07:00.000-07:00

I was standing on the seashore, admiring the ocean waves. Day dreaming with my eyes wide open, a stranger approached me and noticed that my feet were not touching the sand. In a calm but curious manner, he gently asked, "Excuse me Miss; but what are you standing on?" And I replied with such enthusiasm and confidence, "I am standing on the word of GOD!"

Spiritual Haiku

2010-05-01T15:53:00.000-07:00

God has placed a treasure chest in my heart
and has filled it with scriptures!

This too, shall pass

2010-03-10T13:56:00.001-08:00

Feeling blue
Feeling sad

Daydreams and memories
of what I use to have

A happy face,
the perfect smile

Dreams on hold,
I'll be here a while

I'm not the same girl
from months ago

Will she return?
I do not know

One minute, one moment,
one day at a time

As God gently whispers,
"You'll be just fine."

When you have nothing to say, just smile!

2010-02-19T08:46:00.000-08:00

2010-01-25T00:33:00.001-08:00

no words, just thoughts...

A new beginning

2010-01-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

As I sit here and daydream about my life
It boggles my mind that I was once a wife

The memories of yesterday seem so long ago
Never imagined a divorce would help me to grow

Tears of joy and pain somehow intertwined
Like a storm in the midst of a ray of sunshine

The lessons and heartache have since settled in
I no longer wonder what could have been

As a New Year arrives I can hardly wait
As I trust in the Lord who is never late

He promises to reward me if I honor His word
He's waiting to see if my vision will be blurred

I won't disappoint Him as He's been by my side
On those many occasions when I cried and I cried

His new beginning is a way of saying
I've never leave you as long as you keep praying

random thoughts

2009-12-08T13:36:00.000-08:00

grateful silence
heart beating
memories dancing
creative talents
pulsating calmly
eagerness awaits
future unknown

What I'm currently feeling

2009-11-23T10:21:00.000-08:00

I'm at my desk feeling such peace; strange but true.
Raindrops fall outside my large window with a view.

The leaves are barely hanging onto the tree,
and the reflection in my mirror resembles me.

As I surround myself with personal possessions,
Some of my coworkers believe I have an obsession

They're just candles, photos, flowers and dreams.
Imagine the emptiness, how strange would that seem?

For nineteen years, I've worked in this place.
The lack of passion is written on my face.

The Lord has a place for me, He's yet to reveal.
I can hear Him whispering, my child be still

HIS gift to me

2009-11-18T08:54:00.000-08:00

Haiku

As I sit still and
breathe in and breathe out, I am
greatful for my life.

Haiku #14

2009-10-19T19:27:00.000-07:00

I'm not in control.
He is my Lord and Savior,
I am the Servant!

A rookie Haiku...

2009-09-30T03:32:00.001-07:00

This is authored by my sister in law who just recently discovered Haiku.

My mind is racing
Toward the silence of now
Wanting to linger.

by Alicia Fuller
Cleveland, OH

P M S

2009-09-27T13:47:00.001-07:00

Why is it that women have:
Cramps
Bloating
Do I look fat in this
Too tight bras
Uncomfortable lingerie
3'' Stilletos
Bad hair days
Chocolate cravings
Men that stare
Men that think they have a chance
Men that can't fix sh_t
Those last 10 lbs
Scales that lie
1 pair of good jeans
Stretch marks
Old love letters
Too much make up
Too little sleep
Endless to do list
Butts like our mothers
Hearts bigger than a globe
and all men have are inexpensive
haircuts and remote controls?

Quiet Haiku

2009-09-15T03:13:00.000-07:00

Just before sunrise
the morning appears calm and
I am at one with Him

Haiku #13

2009-09-08T19:53:00.000-07:00

Tonight, I confessed my sins
to the Lord and again,
he forgave me

My awesome GOD

2009-08-27T16:35:00.000-07:00

Grateful Haiku

The Lord sustains me
Forty-five years later and,
he's my every breath

she loves him, she loves him not...

2009-08-25T03:24:00.000-07:00

don't know if she is in love with him
or in love with the way he loves her

or could it be that she's simply in love
with the thought of being in love?

Not your traditional Haiku

2009-08-20T07:22:00.000-07:00

dedidcated to Langston Hughes

I am having a love affair
with a spirit that has long
passed on

Haiku #12

2009-08-18T11:15:00.000-07:00

Yestermorning
The morning of yesterday
I want to go back there...

Haiku #11

2009-08-17T12:24:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I read a Haiku written by Nikki Giovanni and it was simply 17 syllables. Not the standard 5-7-5. WOW! Another serendipity moment for me. So here's mine...

* On August 16, 2009
I witnessed my first shooting star

Butterfly Haiku

2009-08-16T06:54:00.000-07:00

radiant bold wings
teasing me with her freedom
pulsating with faith

What's the status of your dreams?

2009-08-12T03:14:00.000-07:00

What happens to a dream
deferred
Does it dry up
Like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore
and then run?

Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sages
Like a heavy load
Or does it Explode?

-Langston Hughes

Quote of the day

2009-08-09T06:46:00.001-07:00

"You will not find poetry anywhere
unless you bring some of it with you."

-Joseph Joubert

Keeping secrets....

2009-08-04T08:07:00.000-07:00

Today's prompt -- While snooping around her daughter's computer, a mother finds that the girl has been chatting online with a much older man.

I knew that getting Kelly that computer was a big mistake. She is consumed with the Internet and she never comes out of her room. I blame myself for our lack of communication and still can't bring myself to tell her the truth about her dad. If she knew that he was still alive and just a plane ticket away, I'm sure she would have run away years ago. In my efforts to make up for his absence, I overworked myself at the office and under worked my role as her mom.

I know she's keeping secrets from me because we never say more than good morning and good night to one another. And although I make a conscience effort to ask about her day, the only response I ever get is, "I'm fine."

I'm so close to losing her and I don't know what to do about it. She'll be a senior next year and my infamous, "Because I'm your mother, that's why" will no longer work on her. She already has one foot out the door and if she and I didn't agree on anything else, we both agreed how important her education was.

When she leaves for school this morning, I'm going to surprise her by cleaning her room and doing her laundry. Whenever she had asked me to do it in the past, I would tell her in my very stern and motherly voice, "I won't always be around to pick up after you young lady."

It was just after eight, she was heading out the door to catch her bus and what happend next totally caught me off guard. She came over to me directly over to me and just as I was about to take a sip my green tea, she gave me the biggest hug ever along with a kiss on the cheek. Stuck in a trance, I simply didn't know how to take it and before I could reciprocate, she was out the door. Wow, I thought to myself, "How strange was that?"

Anyway, I went into her bedroom and as usual, it looked as if a cyclone had just hit it and the only thing left standing were her bed and her computer. She'd forgotten to turn it off and as I walked over to push the green power button, there was a picture of a man down on one knee still displayed across her monitor. He was holding a what appeared to be a heart shaped diamond engagement ring. And as I looked closer at the guy's face, I couldn't believe me fucking eyes, it was her dad. Under the photo was a message that said, "I can't wait to start our life together. You are a dream come true. I love you always.
P.S. Don't forget your passport."

Sleepy Haiku

2009-07-30T15:00:00.000-07:00

eyelids closing now
first class ticket to dream land
hope to see you there

Haiku #10

2009-07-26T03:44:00.000-07:00

Leaping through my life
I happened upon a frog
He came in 1st place

Taking the first step...

2009-07-24T05:57:00.000-07:00

Once you make a decision,
the universe conspires to make it happen.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Innocence lost

2009-07-19T08:38:00.000-07:00

I am writing from a place you have never been
Where a nineteen-year-old girl was naive
and an old man took advantage

Where she heads off to work in a row house
that resembles an office
It's filled with sketches, blueprints and a
huge wooden drafting table equipped with a stool

Where the boss sits and watches from the corner of his eye
Slowing undressing her while she’s performing her duties
Where his thoughts are indecent and his motives are shameful

Where the atmosphere is often quiet except when the phone rings
A sound of relief that keeps her distracted
from the obvious behavior of man so determined to seduce her

Regardless of the fact that his wife has met her
and even adores her
Their daughter has befriended her
and even resembles her

Where the days are long and often exhausting
Fighting off advances and refusing his gratuities
in between counting the fixtures and handing out paychecks

Where the nights are much worse
She feels powerless and afraid as he climbs on top of her
The weight is enormous and she feels like she's drowning

The sounds of his panting like a dog in heat so close to her ears
The moaning gets louder outweighing the clock just above them
As the second hand ticks slower and slower as she stares off
into space wondering why is this happening

Now the tears are flowing like a miniature waterfall
and her clothes are disheveled like a recent windstorm

The smell of his aroma seems embedded in her skin
So strong to the nostril that you can’t find the
words but it will long be remembered

It’s a brand new day and she’s back at her desk
She’s answering the phones and it’s business as usual
(copyright 8/05)

2009-07-19T04:18:00.000-07:00

Each day that I grow older, I am reminded that I am also becoming smarter, kinder, funnier; more patient and profound; and one step closer to becoming my best self. (O Magazine)

I can hardly wait to "her!" (my words)

Today's prompt....

2009-07-09T13:56:00.000-07:00

It's your main character's wedding day and....

When the telephone rang, I was surprised to learn that it was Michael. Caught up with the many task ahead, he was the last person that I’d expected to hear from. The sound of his voice was different, nervous and low. Not his usual strong and confident tone that I loved so much. He said that he needed to talk to me and that he was on his way over. Before I could ask what it was in reference to, he had hung up the telephone. What could be so important with the wedding only five hours away? Was he having second thoughts? Did he regret asking me to be his wife? My mind was in a tailspin and I had no control over my thoughts. I immediately ran to the bathroom. To say that I felt butterflies would be an understatement. It was as if I’d eaten something spoiled and my stomach was in knots.

Before I realized it, he was ringing the doorbell. I knew it had to be serious because he did not use his key. And just before I let him in, I paused at the oval shaped mirror in the foyer to check my appearance. I wanted be sure to have on my happy face and not the "What could possibly ruin this day-face?" When I opened the door, he abruptly walked right pass me. No warm greeting, no hug and certainly no indication that this was the happiest day of his life.

"Baby, what is it?" I asked him. He could barely look at me when he turned and took me by the hand. He led me to the sofa; the one we spent countless hours on getting to know one another and later planning our wedding. Just after clearing his throat, he looked deep into my eyes and said, "I need to tell you something and there’s no easy way to say it." Before he could go on, I took a deep breath and told him that I loved him and that we were getting married in less than five hours. Nothing he could say would change that. He looked into my eyes and as a tear rolled down his cheek, he said, "I never got the divorce; Lisa and I are still married."

Are you experiencing writer's block?

2009-06-30T08:40:00.000-07:00

Log onto Writer'sDigest.com and choose a "prompt" to get your juices flowing. Here are some I've selected. I'll be back later with my story.

You were recently laid off. Instead of moping around, you've viewed it as a chance to start fresh. Pick a new career and write about your first day on the job.

You've been hired by a bumper sticker manufacturer to come up with ideas. Write a clever or witty phrase you'd love to see on a bumper sticker. (If you want, write several.)

Write about an intense game of Scrabble that takes an ugly turn for the worse.

Write an apology letter to yourself for not taking a chance you wish you would have—whether it be in love, work, your writing career or even something silly.

Haikus about Perimenopause

2009-06-25T17:22:00.000-07:00

What is this feeling?
Something's taken over me
and I don't like it!!!!!!!!

Mood swings and headaches
I'm singing my favorite song
holding back the tears...

to be continued...

Fear vs Faith

2009-06-19T11:41:00.000-07:00

Fear use to be a really good friend of mine until someone I met introduced me to Faith. Now, Fear is a distant memory and Faith checks in with me on a regular basis.

My friend, "Scrapbook of a closet poet" wrote a special poem on Faith. Reading it lead me to Post the above epiphany. Thanks Jen!

Another favorite quote...

2009-06-18T05:28:00.001-07:00

I feel more alive
when I'm writing
than I do at any other time-
except when I'm making love.

author unknown

One of my favorite quotes...

2009-06-10T16:49:00.000-07:00

We deem those happy who from the experience of life have learned to bear its ill without being overcome by them. "Carl Jung"

I can testify to this being true!
My past pains brought about my current smile!
Love, peace and blessings - Free Spirit

A quote shared this morning by a "COP"

2009-06-07T04:43:00.000-07:00

"The human heart has hidden treasures,
In secret kept, in silence sealed;
The thoughts, the hopes, the dreams, the pleasures,
Whose charms were broken if revealed"

Charlotte Bronte

(Thanks Ofc. Schwalm)

The sun on me

2009-06-01T10:18:00.000-07:00

I'm squinting, it's blinding
my shadow overpowers me

Radiant yellows and oranges
correspond with me

The birds and clouds
compete with me

The warmth and comfort
smothers me

It's fading, please stay
don't abandon me

(copywrite 5/05)

Self discovery - Haiku

2009-05-20T12:08:00.000-07:00

Who I use to be...
Can't even remember her
Hello, have we met?

Haiku - 9

2009-05-08T18:17:00.000-07:00

Words escape me now
letters running through my mind
I'm mentally drained...

What shall I write???

2009-05-04T17:38:00.001-07:00

I usually have no idea what I will say before I begin to write..
I think about my life and how boring it is.. a mother and wife
How could that possible fill up a page or two?

I think about the places I have been, Ocean City, Miami Beach,
Nassau Bahamas, Cancun Mexico, Vegas - Big deal...

I think about my so-called exciting career in law enforcement
Where it’s 99% where’s a cop when you need one? And 1% police
officer killed in the line of duty...

I think about my childhood and not having my parents around
then the words begin to flow… their divorce, the separation from
my sisters, the changing schools and leaving my friends.
Not to mention the therapy...

The thoughts of happily ever after being a claim to fame for
Cinderella but certainly not for me, at least not in this lifetime.

I can write for pages and pages about how unfair life has been to me
and how loneliness can be a girl’s best friend. And just when you
thought it was getting to be a tear jerker, I can twist it around and
write about how I have had enough and decided not to play the
victim anymore!

How turning forty was the best birthday I have ever had.
I call it a revelation, “I’m forty, free & in control of my destiny”

(a page from my writer's journal in 2005)

The meaning of colors

2009-04-30T18:43:00.000-07:00

ORANGE is bright and round like the sun that hangs in the east on my way to work. It makes me feel thankful. Thankful that I am employed even though I wish I could some day quit my job.

WHITE is pure, soft and fluffy like the clouds above. It gives me a feeling of warmth and safety like the smell of downy fabric softener on my bed sheets and the down comforter that I use to tuck myself in at night.

RED is so sexy and bold. It screams, "look at me." Oh how I’d love to wear it just once and not for Valentine’s Day. But I'm too afraid people would stare and judge me. How dare she…

BLACK makes me feel dependent… I need it in my life to camouflage my imperfections. The size and shape of my body, the stretch marks from childbirth. The hips from my ancestors. Oh and did I mention it’s also the color the puts me in the mood? I wouldn't dare make love with the lights on.

BROWN is my favorite… it smells of fresh baked brownies… The ones from Pillsbury that I claim are my own. Don’t forget the x-tra crushed walnuts on top, a secret passed down from my baby sister. Brown is one with me when Mother Nature invades my body.

(from my journal 6/05)

Self discovery

2009-04-28T08:33:00.000-07:00

Fear was my best friend, until I met a MAN
who replaced it with Love!

What the .....

2009-04-25T03:26:00.000-07:00

He called to say that he was just around the corner and that he had something for me. The call caught me totally off guard. I had just finished my meeting and the to-do list was longer than the pencil I’d used to write it with. I was a little agitated that he was so close but anxious at the same time. I was so hoping that what he had would not draw any attention to me, while a small part of me hoped that it was something so extravagant that everyone would be like, “WOW, who gave you that?”

As I calmly walked to his car and pretended to smile, he glanced up at me looking so damn fine. I was so hoping that he could not hear my heart pounding or smell my feminine juices so close to his passenger door. I guess the look on my face was disturbing because he asked if I was OK. I faked it and said, “Yes, I’m just hungry.” No he didn’t ask what did I have a taste for.

I skipped the subject and reached in and took hold of the large blue bag which clearly had my name written on it. I didn’t want to appear eager so I just took hold of it and said, "Thank you." He indicated that there was also a card inside but asked if I could wait until I got home to read it.

He gave me a half smile and said that he had to go. Don't ask why, but I stood there and watched the car drive off wishing I was going with him. As I walked into the building, the suspense was killing me. The bag was so heavy; I immediately went into the ladies room and opened it. Much to my surprise, for lack of better words, it was filled with everything I’d ever given him along with a note saying, goodbye. I must have stayed in the stall for what felt like hours sobbing, wondering, "What in the hell just happened?"

When I was 8

2009-04-22T05:25:00.000-07:00

The view from the top of the street was narrow and steep
At the bottom there was a huge wooded field that had a
small entrance shaped like a cave
Big black bats would fly around at night

On the right side of the street were apartments
Old red brick buildings with little or no character
The wooden steps squeaked and the hallway smelled of old people

We lived on the second floor in a cramped one bedroom
I hated sleeping on the living room floor with my sister
Why didn't I have my own bedroom?

I never went out back to play because the
only view we had was of Saint Elizabeth’s Hospital
I was always afraid that the patients would escape and come after me

I played across the street where the grass was greener
The prettier side, the wealthier side. In my mind I lived there too
It was our house with the big yellow kitchen and a bay window so wide that you could see the entire neighborhood

It was our staircase that led to three huge bedrooms on the second floor; the pink one was mine. The one with the big white canopy bed and the pink and white ruffled bed skirt.
I especially liked the pink lamp, shaped like a pair of ballerina slippers. And I had my very own bathroom.

I hated when my mother called my name. I knew that it was time to come home. Back to the other side, the unattractive side, the dark and lonely side.

First Impressions

2009-04-19T05:52:00.001-07:00

What if I told you that after my parents divorced, my step
dad only took the kids that were his

What if I told you that my mother abandoned me
at the age of 16 to become a writer

What if I told you that at 19 I was sexually assaulted by my
45-year-old supervisor and never told a sole

What if I told you that when I was 20 I tried cocaine for
the first time to just to impress a guy that I hardly even knew

What if I told you that I have been married five times and
that my current husband has no idea

What if I told you that my credit score is at its all time high
but I have less than $50 in my savings account

What if I told you that I’m one of the most popular people
at work but that my self esteem is at its all time low

What if I told you that I suffer from obsessive-compulsive
disorder and that unorganized people really piss me off

What if I told you that my biological father works at a
nearby coffee shop and he has no idea that I even exist

What if I told you that of all the things I just
revealed, only one of them is true

April rain

2009-04-16T16:17:00.000-07:00

Midst
drops
downpours

Slanted
straight
intermissions

Warm
cold
freezing pellets

Subtle
windy
hold onto something

Thunder
lighting
clouds clashing

Dark
sunny
beautiful rainbow

Metamorphosis

2009-04-10T14:09:00.000-07:00

Innocent
playful
believing in fairy tales

abandoned
disconnected
and searching for self

desperate
unworthy
holding on for dear life

in love
confused
pretending to smile

transforming
searching
trying to blend in

discarded
fearful
the pieces come together

emerging
exploring
reach out and touch her

uninhibited
radiant
free spirit butterfly

The Dance

2009-04-08T07:47:00.000-07:00

His eyes are undressing me
His lips are caressing me

His hands discover me
His stiffness is calling me

His temperature warms me
His strength overpowers me

His sweat drenches me
His body smothers me

His moans excite me
His thrusts delight me

His rhythm follows me
His endurance boggles me

His passion takes hold of me
His juices explode in me

This house...

2009-04-05T06:11:00.000-07:00

This house is too big
This house is so small
This house is always cold
This house is very hot
This house is cluttered
This house is always neat
This house seems empty
This house feels lived in
This house sounds noisy
This house is too quiet
This house is very bright
This house is often dark
This house smells weird
This house smells sweet
This house is so dusty
This house is spotless
This house is very unique
Because this house is my home

Random thoughts

2009-04-02T18:22:00.000-07:00

I'm in my space
my private place

Me and the keys
no one to squeeze

The sky is dark
did Max just bark?

It's getting late
wow, when was the last time I had a date?

Tomorrow will come
I'll get up with the sun

The birds will sing
and I'll give praise to the "KING"

National Poetry Month

2009-04-02T03:17:00.000-07:00

Good morning to all
April is National Poetry Month
I'm going to try and commit to a
poem a day. I will not post one a day
but I will be ------- obsessively!

"Let the writing begin....."

Love, peace and creative juices!

Here are a few of my favorites...

I crave you

I want to make love to you
to be held, kissed and caressed

I want to lay naked next to you
and submit completely

I don't want to think or talk
I just want to be...

I want the love and forbidden
passion to spill over into morning

I want to be transported to a place
where nothing and no one exist

And upon our return to reality
I will just say goodbye

I am...

I am lost and I am found
I am physically exhausted

but mentally empowered
I am free of my past

and embracing the future
I am letting go of the clutter

but holding tight to the memories
I am rediscovering my inner child

while growing into womanhood
I am writing my own song

with the guidance of my soul
I am no longer the understudy

I am finally on center stage!

Haiku - 8

2009-04-01T03:54:00.000-07:00

How incredible
I do not seek happiness
it somehow finds me!

Haiku - 7

2009-03-31T02:48:00.001-07:00

Today is Tuesday
my heart beats calmly and
the day awaits me...

In the company of stillness...

2009-03-28T13:55:00.000-07:00

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
the fluffy white clouds are perfectly still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
the birds on my fence are standing still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
the sun to the west of me is hanging still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
the leaves on the maple tree are holding still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
my rambling thoughts are becoming still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
my heavy breathing is becoming still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
the beating of my heart is becoming still

As I sit here alone by the windowsill
I am, if only for a moment, still

I am ready

2009-03-24T03:16:00.001-07:00

When I was 17, he pretended not to notice me but I could always feel him watching me. That turned into an abusive relationship that resulted in a baby girl, 5lbs 6 ½ ounces… I wasn’t ready

When I was 22, he was the perfect gentleman. I kept asking myself, “When is this guy going to kiss me?” That turned into a fair skinned little boy with auburn hair and again, I wasn’t ready…

When I was 27, he came to almost every rehearsal. Imagine, little old shy me in a fashion show. That turned into my first real love; I thought I was ready…

When I was 33, he was my Knight in Shining Armor, or so I thought. That turned into “till death do us part.” Wow, marriage…are you every ready?

When I was 42, alone in my room; the tears were overflowing and HE whispered to me, “Don’t cry, its okay. I’m here for you.” Finally, I was getting ready.

Approaching 45, search no more, the wounds have healed, my heart is receptive and I am ready to love. I mean the give it all you’ve got, this is who I am, don’t try to change me, are you ready for this, kind of love?

Yes, I am ready!

Haiku - 6

2009-03-22T05:37:00.000-07:00

Have you ever loved?
I mean the gut wrenching kind
that happens just once...

Stacye's Haiku

2009-03-20T09:40:00.000-07:00

My sister in Christ
A light that shines from day one
still Standing Able...

Happy hour from 5-7pm

2009-03-18T21:01:00.000-07:00

If I could go back
I would have eaten more vegetables
done my homework
cleaned my room
made more friends
cherished my virginity
been more outspoken
been more forgiving
spent more wisely
taken more risk
laughed out loud
danced more freely
declined the offer
to go out for drinks
and had one too many
then got behind the wheel
ran through the light
and sped out of control
which caused the collision
that struck a car
and killed their father

Funny Haiku

2009-03-17T05:30:00.000-07:00

If I were the boss
we would have pajama day
but no sleepovers ;-)

Tammy's Haiku

2009-03-16T05:44:00.000-07:00

You think you know me?
I am a work in progress
I don't know me, yet...

Serendipity

2009-03-14T09:18:00.001-07:00

He took hold of my hand
and looked deep through my eyes

At the sound of his voice
I was completely mesmerized

Walking barefoot in the sand
while sharing our life stories

He would comment on the ocean
and all of God’s glory

As the sun began to set and
the evening was nearing its end

From the moment he looked through me
was when he had become, my best friend

Author unknown

2009-03-13T06:58:00.000-07:00

We are not born all at once, but by bits.
The body first, and then the spirit later.

Winter Haiku

2009-03-11T02:49:00.000-07:00

Long days and dark nights,
at least for now, are long gone.
Until we fall back...

He said, they all said...

2009-03-10T03:11:00.000-07:00

You're beautiful, I love you
Trust me, I love you
I'm here for you, I love you
You're everything to me, I love you
Spend your life with me, I love you
We'll grow old together, I love you
I'm sorry, I love you
Good bye...

And Jesus said, "I'll never leave you."

Haiku - 5

2009-03-08T12:20:00.000-07:00

What is chemistry?
When two souls connect without
ever having sex!

"If the timing had been different..."

2009-03-05T02:50:00.000-08:00

I keep trying to convince myself that things would be different for the both of us. I would not be married and he would not be recently divorced. Whose to say that he and I would even be a couple? All I know is that if we’d had this chance years ago, things may have turned out differently.

I can actually picture us being happy, comfortable and content. Not letting the outside world get to us, not letting the stresses of the job put up walls in our family life and being one of those couples that people actually envy. Our kids would constantly tease us for always showing affection in public and their friends would always want to spend time at our house. They’d said, “Your parents are so cool.”

We would take family vacations twice a year and then there would be occasions when we would have “grown up time.” The kids would be gone for the summer and we would live freely like two teenagers without a care in the world. We would make love every day and sometimes twice a day. We would forget to eat and clean up and just lay back, laugh and play hooky from work.

But then reality sets in and I open my eyes to see that if the timing had been different, maybe he would have bumped into me; said, " excuse me" and kept right on walking.