Nothing

as of late...I just don't feel like it
not the reading
not the praying
not the crying
not the living

i don't feel like nothing really
just wanting to sit by the window
frozen in my sacred space
just the two of us

no set schedule or timimg
when i'm there i'm supposed to be
not wanting to do anything else

i don't want to talk
i don't want to text...send or receive
i don't want to check emails
not even incoming prayer requests

i'm unable to mouth the words
i'm unable to explain to others
i'm unable to pen it to my journal

i deeply love him
i fully trust him
i wholeheartedly believe in him

but honestly...as of late
i'm wanting to do nothing really

the fire is still inside of me
the desire burns for his kingdom
and the calling will be fulfilled

but as of late...my tank is empty
this flesh is burden and i hate this world
i cannot sit idle and do nothing